On the Waning Masculinity of Modern Man and the Misconceptions of the Concept

 

“By the way, don't 'weep inwardly' and get a sore throat. If you must weep, weep: a good honest howl! I suspect we - and especially, my sex - don't cry enough now-a-days. Aeneas and Hector and Beowulf, Roland and Lancelot blubbered like schoolgirls, so why shouldn't we?”

 —C.S. Lewis

Masculinity. Just the term makes men and women in society think of something negative, toxic, or abhorrent. Like something out of the depths of hell, all-consuming all evil. But it's a misconception. Just like the quote above this text that you, my dear reader, read just a moment earlier. Perhaps you get the gist of the quote, or perhaps I got the interpretation wrong? But that is something you will have to decide for yourself. On the contrary, the C.S. Lewis quote above does not encourage men's weakness. It encourages men to not keep their emotions so tightly closed and bottled. Why? Because there will be a catastrophe if a man bottled up his emotions for so long without releasing them.

But why do men need to release their emotions? Why do they need a release valve for those emotional excesses? It is because the machine needs to be more efficient. If a machine does not have a proper pressure valve, the system will be compromised, and the machinery will not work properly and efficiently. It is the same for men. If they do not release their pent-up emotion, their activities will plummet, their mentality will degrade, and their souls will fade bit by bit. That is why crying or shedding tears does not reduce masculinity, nor does it degrade the innate manly qualities.

But shedding tears is not an excuse to be vulnerable or show weakness. That is just pure and utter emasculation and shame. Crying is not an excuse to be weak and renounce masculine qualities. This is what modern men misunderstand. That it is alright to cry and lament while staying weak. It is permissible to cry if your loved ones have died and you have to undergo a state of catharsis. But permission to cry is not a permission to stay weak. It is not a permission to stay unfit, fat, obese, effeminate, and degenerate. As men, it is NOT alright to STAY WEAK.

But what is masculinity in the first place? Many people, both those who support and decry masculinity alike, misunderstand it. At its very core, masculinity is simply defined by these words of a famous man — "I don’t want to do it, but I will anyway." Masculinity is the ability to be RESPONSIBLE. To be STRONG to do what is NECESSARY despite not wanting to do it anyway. Let’s take, for example, the Bible. God gave Adam the authority to protect the earth and be its steward. Adam did not want to do it, but he had to. Another example is Cincinnatus, the Roman dictator around 458 BC. Cincinnatus was a dictator who was elected almost three times. And each time that he was elected, there was a crisis. Cincinnatus did not want to do it; he only wanted to be a farmer, but he did it anyway. Each time Cincinnatus averted the crisis in the Roman Republic while utilizing his brilliant dictatorial skills, he immediately let go of power and retired to his farm. This process of becoming a dictator, solving the crisis, and immediately letting go of it happened three times. That is STRENGTH. That is VIRTUE. That is RESPONSIBILITY. That is MASCULINITY. To do things that are necessary despite not wanting to do them.

Modern man forgot that line of thinking. Modern Man seeks only pleasure. The modern man only seeks to sit on the couch and watch his daily show on his device, which is fueled purely by sheer consumeristic desire. He has no desire to be RESPONSIBLE. How many fatherless children does this current society have? How many families does this modern society have without a masculine father figure? Absolutely uncountable. But that is not the disgusting part. The disgusting part is that modern men seemingly ignore this. The modern man did not want to cultivate responsibility. They want permission to cry, but they do not want to be strong. They want the ability to be in constant consumeristic pleasure, but they do not want to take on the boulder of responsibility.

That is why I determine that modern men have their masculinity waning and degrading while, at the same time, misunderstanding the concept of masculinity entirely. CS Lewis said the quote above because he knew the implications if men bottled up their emotions. But he also knew the implications if men stayed weak. Aeneas, Hector, Beowulf, Roland, and Lancelot blubbered like schoolgirls, but they did not stay weak. Aeneas laid the foundation for the Roman Tribe through the sword; Hector fought Achilles valiantly; Beowulf slayed a beast; Roland fought the Basques fiercely with a sword in hand; and Lancelot performed his wars and knightly duels with strength and virtue.

I will finish this blog by saying to you, my dear readers, if you are not currently hostile to me, especially if you are a man (or even a woman), that you should not forget the principles of STRENGTH and RESPONSIBILITY. These are the main traits of a manly man.

“The essence of masculinity is taking responsibility for yourself, then a wife, then children.”

            —Mark Driscoll